Two people sit down to talk.
One moves quickly, eager to press forward.
The other slows, weighing each word.
Each assumes the other wants what they want. Each assumes sameness.
In that small mismatch, tension quietly hardens — not because either is wrong, but because neither changed their posture. Connection frays.
Inspired by Black Swan, we added Stances into the Dojo practice to give that moment a simple, lived remedy.
Why we call them Stances
A stance is not a type. It’s not a label.
It’s your unique expression of FEBI™ energy in this moment — the way your breath, tone, timing, and attention combine into a conversational posture.
People share the potential for each of the core energies — Visionary, Organizer, Collaborator, Driver — but every person’s stance is an idiosyncratic expression of those energies.
That is why we call them Stances: they’re personal, they move, they can be changed.
The essential insights
- Different people, different stances. Each person’s FEBI™ energies show up in their own rhythm, tone, and style of conversation. Your perception of another’s stance guides what you do next.
- You can shift your stance. Posture and breath change quickly; so can conversational posture. When you shift, you invite shift.
- Platinum and Golden. Don’t assume sameness. Meet people as they are — align with the stance you perceive, not the stance you prefer, at first. Connect in a way that creates a circuit, and listen for opportunities to make a shift.
Alignment work — influence, not force
Perception matters more than declaration.
If you sense an energy that feels heavy or “below the line,” naming it anchors it. Instead, adjust your own stance: calibrate your tone, lengthen breath, lift the frame, and draw on the moves to shift the flow.
People mirror much of what they sense in you. A gentle shift in your posture — supported by deliberate tone and the right move — often invites a gentle shift in theirs.
Stance work is alignment work. And it matters most in the intense moments, where small differences cascade into big ruptures.
If you can align stances in those tight windows, you keep the field open. Once aligned, the conversation is free to go wherever it needs to go.
- To invite integration, infuse your stance with Collaborator energy.
- To open possibility, lean into Visionary energy.
- To steady a chaotic moment, offer Organizer energy.
- To mobilize action, use Driver energy.
The living practice
We stripped away the heavy details that freeze practice.
What we keep is a set of habits that live in the body: notice, breathe, shift, and return to curiosity.
Stances nest inside the Dojo’s principles:
- Relax completely
- Feel into impulse waves
- Meet tension with presence
- Form reflection into reflex
Stances are not another taxonomy.
They are a way of standing — personal, dynamic, embodied.
A way to meet others in the flow of energy, and to invite them higher.
⛩️🖥️
Related Learning
Mindset Dojo Insights — Tone
Explores how tone is the “weather” of a conversation — coloring every word and shifting whether dialogue builds, opens, or shuts down.
Mindset Dojo Insights — Map of Consciousness
Introduces the Map of Consciousness as a compass for noticing whether conversations open into creativity or contract into defensiveness.
